Some time after getting back to Australia my babe Sabi asked if I wanted to get matching “wet leaf and soggy bean” tattoos with her.

Obviously getting an in-joke from over a decade ago permanently inked onto our bodies would be a stupid idea, so I immediately said yes.

_{2011 sure was 13 years ago.}

Enjoy your wet leaves.”– Khye.

Accepting the risk that even if I provide the above image and explain the context there’s a maximum of maybe 5 people who will actually understand it at all and every single one of them would be forgiven for thinking it is, in fact: “Pretty cringe, bro.”

But none of this is for you, is it? So mind your business.

On the right with the grey hair is Khye, my main man from way back, drinking a cup of coffee while sitting across from the dark haired Bertrand, on the left, doing his best to enjoy a cup of tea. They’re pretentious and insufferable and don’t particularly like each other. But are forced to tolerate each other in that tedious corporate-networking way because the real antagonist is always capitalism in every conceivable narrative, do not fight me on this.

_{Colouring these assholes by mouse is why I was misdiagnosed with RSI for over two decades.}

Enjoy your soggy bean water.”– Bertrand.

Sabi handled the booking process partly because she’s got quite a few tattoos already so knows how to do that, but also because this was allegedly my birthday present even though I stopped having those decades ago.

Actually, uni results from semester two were released the same week we ended up getting these done, so maybe instead I can say it’s a reward for not failing?

Initially we were going to go at the end of October after the uni term wrapped up, but the first artist wasn’t happy with the designs and suggested we try somebody else.

Mid-November we ended up spending a day in the capable hands of Sophie the Fifth at Seven Saints Tattoo- and wouldn’t you know, not even two days later one of my other friends was also getting some work done by Sophie!

Her portrait style is very distinctive so I was pretty keen to just let her go ham on the designs.

Aside from our mans and their beverages, CLAMP manga panels provided inspiration as they tend to go hard on the floral motifs.

_{Sophie’s designs, she made them so much more elegant than either of them deserves.}

Bertrand features a border of green tea and earl grey flowers, while Khye’s border is coffee berries.

They’re positioned on our backs, Bertrand on Sabi’s right shoulder and Khye on my left, so they can face each other when we sit next to each other. Or ignore each other if we sit on the wrong sides?

_{Fresh (left) and 24 hours later (right).}

Slammed an electrolyte drink and protein bar before my session to minimise the chances of passing the fuck out. Didn’t experience any negative side effects afterwards, but slept better than I have in months. Who knew an afternoon under a tattoo gun was the cure for insomnia?!

They each took around 3 hours of work and we got Second Skin dressings applied at the end. It’s kind of like an adhesive cling wrap which helps to keep the wound sterile for the first few days of healing. After about 5 days mine was starting to peel so I took it off in the shower, horrible experience, very slimy and weird, not unlike peeling off Furby’s old beak last entry. Sabi made it about 6 or 7 days before removing her Second Skin.

From there it’s not too dissimilar from taking care of an eczema flare up; keep in clean and moist without being damp, but otherwise don’t fucking touch it no matter how itchy it gets.

_{Bepanthen was the only targeted purchase thanks to my habit of maintaining a constant supply of various unscented, hypoallergenic moisturisers.}

There are three key highlights of Khye’s design that I am particularly enamoured with:

1. The latte art.
2. His teeth.
3. His thumbnail.

Not to be an edgelord on main, but Khye is half vampire, he might’ve been hanging out with Bertrand in 2011 but I’ve been drawing him since 2003, what did you expect?

… How do I regain that level of unapologetic self-indulgence?

_{One week later, now without the Second Skin.}

At this stage I’m assuming he’s healing up okay, but it’s not like I’ve got any prior experience to fall back on in this context.

Fun experience regardless, I’m glad we were able to get these done.