Brought to the daylight.

The coalition have kind of fucked up the whole vaccination rollout, leaving much of Australia back in lockdown purgatory with the vague hope of maybe, y’know, not dying from COVID-19 while we wait for vaccines which may or may not ever arrive thanks to a government who may or may not have lied about even ordering them in the first place- paired with a staunch refusal to invest in any form of on-shore manufacture (in any industry, that one’s not solely limited to life-saving medications).

Admittedly this is… still kind of my ideal lifestyle. Don’t get me wrong, the financial instability isn’t great, but billionaires are having a straightup space-race in the middle of a literal pandemic, so I’m willing to bet the financial instability has a lot more to do with capitafeudalist ideals devaluing manufacturing skillsets (which mean nothing in a country with no manufacturing industry anyway) (and would likely still land me below the poverty line even where it is a viable career option- because ultimately: human rights violations are hard work and everyone else deserves to be violated).

People aware of my situation will frequently ask: “What do you want to do?” Which is well meaning enough, but ultimately I’m burned out to the point of just want to be left alone in a way that the average citizen is forgiven for interpreting as unhealthy.

I’m tired.

Leaving the house necessitates the unsustainable performance of a character that is agreeable, helpful, loves warm sunny days, misses going out on the weekends, and can’t wait to ditch these damn masks am I right?!

Night feels like the only time I really get to myself; it’s quiet, dark, cold, and the only people talking to me are people I actively want to be talking to- a presumably mutual feeling when there is little obligation to respond to any given form of communication at 3am.

No doubt falling asleep on the couch wedged between two cats, a Nintendo, and the crushing weight of existential apathy is doing wonders for my posture.