Don’t go down with your mistakes.

  It’s 2023 now, I guess?

Claude died at the start of the year and I’ve been pretty deep in the Depression Zone™ since then. It was the week before uni resumed and I couldn’t really focus on anything at all until after getting results back from midterms. Probably haven’t failed 1st semester but won’t know the full damage until early July if my calendar is to be believed.

Was hoping to get a half-decent job lined up before uni went back, but I remain blissfully unemployable. Took a bunch of leave from work when Claude died and ended up quitting even without any sort of back up plan because existing is fake anyway. Minimum wage had me setting the bar so fucking low, capitalism is a trap.

Even now you look at the news to see inflation being blamed on service workers asking for “too much” (?) as though food and shelter shouldn’t be human rights; but under capitalism I suppose the ultimate ideal is for nothing to be a human right if you can’t afford to pay for it.

Where do we acknowledge the nature of entropy in these equations? Just ignore it? Okay.

The store is adequately staffed, your priorities just aren’t right.”– Retail site manager.

Profits are still up, but store sales dropped by 20% so the store budget was cut by 20%. We don’t think too hard about the maths there, or the fact that the company owners don’t need two (2) private jets. Staff earning enough to feed themselves though?! Now that’s where we draw the line!

This is the actual environment that I really left. The weight of the purchases you are unwilling to take personal responsibility for? It is no longer upon my shoulders.

Embrace autonomy:

[   L e a v e   m e   a l o n e .   ]

Being voluntarily unemployed is genuinely the less humiliating option right now. The newsreaders are correct: I simply do not want to work under these conditions, in this economy.

Last December, for the holidays, while still employed, work allowed us to make our own aprons rather than wearing the standard uniform. Unlike the previous year we had to buy it rather than write it off though, so I just used the leftovers from 2021 because they paid me minimum wage so I gave them minimum effort.

Claude in fusible interfacing.
Claude, however, gave maximum effort every single day of her life.

In 2021 I was also making up for lost time with the combination of COVID-19 lockdowns and my brain being mulched by anticonvulsants, so the project was kind of hectic with lights and baubles.

For 2022 I kind of chilled out and put some actual thought into the composition.

Claude the Helpercat™.
Actually I give full credit to Claude, may she rest in peace.

The base fabric is red tartan, with a green tartan border.

Didn’t have a lot of gingerbread leftover, so I divided it into 3 portions across the apron to give the illusion that there was more (the tartans aren’t part of the holiday product range, so we weren’t really supposed to use them since the aprons are supposed to be visual merchandising displaying the holiday fabrics).

Claude offering her professional opinion.
Claude approves the construction before moving onto the next step.

The upper-right corner folds down in a mock-layer effect, featuring the gingerbread with a navy-blue tartan underneath. While the pocket features tartan ribbon details with calico and green tartan bordering the gingerbread.

It is hemmed with a panel of gingerbread before being bordered with more green around the 3 skirt edges.

Claude operating vintage Juki DDL-555.
Claude operating a vintage Juki DDL-555 industrial sewing machine.

Finally, it was lined with a poplin featuring skulls, roses, and ravens. Mostly because it isn’t really visible at all and I have quite a lot of that fabric on hand.

But also because something, something, poorly thought out metaphor for naughty children, Krampus, etc..

gingerbread apron
2022 holiday apron.

It’s genuinely fun seeing all the different styles everybody comes up with across the store, but also makes me wonder why home-made seasonal items are banned the rest of the year?
Just kidding, the answer is class suppression.

Upon requesting more staff the site manager informed us in no uncertain terms that:

“The store is adequately staffed, your priorities just aren’t right.”

So on the grounds of a cold and unforgiving death that awaits all of us regardless of our willingness to acknowledge it: I have prioritised my education instead.

Am I mismanaging business finances? No, it's the minimum wage service workers who are wrong.
Capitalism was a mistake and I hope their jet catches fire.